Why First IVF Cycle Always Fails? 5 Mistakes You Should Avoid

During my interaction with ladies I saw a common thread of IVF failure in first attempt. Very rarely would you find a woman who gave birth during her first IVF cycle. I couldn’t help but think hard about the why behind the failure here.

We use the same medicine, same diagnosis, same treatment, and same money then why does first IVF cycle invariably fails while the second or third attempt gives results in most cases. Even my first IVF cycle failed while I succeeded in the second attempt. I mulled over it, researched deep, read stories, listened to experiences and thereafter I realized that the problems underneath are Stress, Anxiety And Excess Hope.

Let me explain this in detail.

During our first IVF we don’t know the drill. So, everything causes anxiety. Even an ultrasound does. Again, the family especially parents become over-caring asking you to take bed rest so much so that you are not even allowed to rest your foot of ground and keep lying down with feet on pillows for the whole period. This rather than helping works in the opposite way for now you have so much time and just one pestering thought, “Will it, Will it not succeed?”

How To Sail Through First IVF?

Here are a few tips and ideas that you can incorporate in your lifestyle to sail through IVF. These are derived from my personal experiences and from discussions with our group of infertility warriors. Follow these and save yourself from a heartbreak and get better IVF success rate.

Disclaimer: Follow what your doctor says as every case is different.


1.     Bed Rest Is A Myth

In most cases it is seen that the effects of bed rest on the success of IVF is a hyped phenomena. You need to take it slow for the first 72 hours of embryo transfer. And that not the bed rest that won’t even allow you to sit upright to watch TV. Rather, a better alternative is to go about normal activities, do something creative like painting, writing, stitching; anything that engages you positively and takes your mind off the constant thought. Though, it will be in your mind for it is a turning point event but then don’t let it take the shape of nagging.

2.     Stay Neutral – Neither Positive, Nor Negative

I will not ask you to stay positive for again, it is over rated. However, I will suggest you to try a new thing – Stay neutral. Surrender yourself and believe that whatever decision Almighty takes will be for your good in the long run. Accept God’s decision. If you conceive you will be grateful but if you don’t conceive don’t hate God. Dream for the best but also prepare yourself for the worst. Engage your over active mind in an activity that you love or the one that you always wanted to do to keep it calm and neutral.

3.     Have Plan B

Always have a Plan B. So, it should not be like, “God, please, please, please, give me a baby. You have to listen to me this time, please, please, please”. Don’t nag God. Instead say, “If I conceive then good, I will be grateful to God but if the IVF fails then I will follow Plan B”. This Plan B can be anything like taking a vacation, meeting up friends or as in my case I had decided that if IVF fails then the very next month I start with the adoption process. This gave me the closure that I wanted and also having a structured path to follow kept the anxiety and over-hope away. Be practical about your situation. Miracles do happen but then staying practical is a better way to handle infertility.

4.     Pre-IVF Preparation Is Important

Don’t just jump into an IVF. Take atleast 6 months to prepare your body and mind. IVF is both physically and mentally taxing. If you don’t feel ready then postpone it. A lot of time doctors will bully you to get IVF done soon or in a particular time but see through their logic. If there is no logic to their argument then debate it and don’t follow the doctors blindly. It is your body and you know it best. Alternative therapies are known to have visible results in both conscious and subconscious level, in all helping your body and mind to prepare for IVF. Acupuncture, Meditation, Ayurveda and Naturopathy are quite helpful for holistic preparation of IVF.

5.      Younger, The Better = First IVF Cycle Success

This is big myth – one should wait till 35 and a lot of failed fertility treatment to think about IVF. WRONG. Every case is different. Assess your medical case carefully. If eventually you are inching towards assisted reproductive technique like IVF or as we commonly call in India as Test Tube Baby then it is best to take a call and go for it at the earliest. IVF success rates are higher with younger women. So, in contradiction to common thinking that IVF is for older women, I would say decide on IVF based on your infertility condition and not age factor. A lot women waste time thinking that they are yet too young for IVF and continue to trouble their body (conceiving naturally ending up in miscarriage). So, calm down, think hard and take a wise decision.

IVF is extremely intensive and intrusive treatment. Failure of first IVF cycle is devastating. Apart from the side effects of medical treatment it also causes undulating depression. This is already a tough journey let’s not make it tougher by rushing into treatments. It is important to be in the right frame of mind, good health and balanced energy levels before starting an IVF cycle.




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  5. […] Then the time came when we decided to go for IVF. I was confident that this ‘man-made’ technique would create a miracle which we were earlier expecting from God. Little did we know, our battle was not over yet! Our IVF failed. […]

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  8. […] I have met or read about. But there are also cases where many couples have gone through multiple IVF failures, trauma and agony that follow it. It is a highly expensive process and therefore couples have to be […]

  9. […] Read: Why First IVF Cycle Always Fails? 5 Mistakes You Should Avoid […]

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  11. […] Also Read: Why First IVF Cycle Always Fails? 5 Mistakes You Should Avoid […]

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