Yes, I am not a witch. It is natural for me to cry on baby announcements when undergoing infertility journey. I don’t mean any harm to your child. I just get upset and extremely emotional when I see a young baby. My failure to conceive stares right through me.
I don’t want to go to the hospital to congratulate on your child’s birth because when I am there I will bravely hold the fort, smile, shield my emotions while hiding my true emotions all through. Did you people, who are lucky to conceive and deliver a baby easily, ever realized how much strength it requires to just stand there, congratulate you and feel the pain of not having to experience this ever. No you guys don’t. If we show our emotions and fall weak – we are witches who can’t have a baby themselves so bring misfortune by crying when the occasion requires one to be happy. If we stay strong – we are arrogant who are faking their emotion.
Such is our paradox. I wish all those happy mothers more happiness! Only if they understood how difficult this journey of infertility is.
Will you believe me when I honestly confess that I didn’t go when my 5 years younger and only sister was delivering a baby. I told my parents, I can’t. It will be very difficult for me and they calmy understood. While there were other people in the family who didn’t and made me suffer by being judgmental and excessively critical.
The ‘Godhbharai’ Ceremony
I have been told by women undergoing infertility that there are instance when they have been diplomatically asked to stay away from the ‘godhbharai’ ceremony of a close cousin or relative. It can’t get more insensitive and disrespectful than this. If you too face such a situation, don’t sneak or hide away, and cry in dark instead look up in their eyes and stand up. Deal with it in a dignified and graceful way.
Just a word here for family and relatives- Try to understand, atleast try.
Don’t Feel Guilty
And, for you all going through the painful journey of struggle with infertility, trust me, what you are feeling is a natural and common emotion. Don’t feel guilty about it. Do what your heart says and try to educate the people (only who matter) around you but never lose your self-esteem. It is just a phase, a very tough and dark one but this too shall pass.Tags: baby announcements crying when infertile infertility journey infertility treatment